An Agent Gone Rogue

From my recent piece…“Wars of the mind break out when the agent goes rogue. The space of the becoming serves to align the agent with its consciousness. One who can meet themself in this space is an individual in the state of becoming.”

Constructing

Constructing who we are is a daunting lifelong task with the same persistent ending awaiting everyone. Collectively, we are all filling time. All of us wake to the sun to go about our daily routines. Occasionally, celebrate and mourn the passage of time. When you really stop to look around at everything you’ve shared time with, you may find yourself in a rumination period. Transporting oneself through the times of their life will present the individual with varying versions of themselves. Often marked by some form of information that has come to conscious awareness, and the emotional state is cemented with the information. Everything that exists in time will meet the person when they arrive there. Whatever does not meet the person in time was not present in the person’s time. Rush or slow down, time will pass.

Upon our arrival in the present, the construction of the self has come with no instructions. Who the individual is at any given point in time is a conglomeration of every version they have been, and every characteristic they hope to be. Before one can meet oneself in the state of becoming, there is an essential step to be made. Deconstruction of the pieces that create the puzzle of the self is part of the process in constructing the self. Before dissection, everyone comes to the table bearing an armor that’s been assembled by the responsive self. The emotional state tethered to the information learned, marking a past version of the self, does not have to be permanent. Emotions are fluid, and reflection may allow the individual to experience new states of self to occur. Picking one piece off at a time will realize and celebrate these pieces of the self. To accept yourself, you must know who you are.

A Rogue Agent

The intelligence of the being allows for decision-making. An agent that roams without the guidance of the known self will inevitably struggle to make decisions in their best interest. Instead, the decision will be made by the perceiving individual. The self is concerned with how they perceive themselves and how others perceive them. Decisions made from perception will not be based on the self. This will guide the individual down a path of illusory truth, a perception of what one must do. An agent who does not operate with their inner guidance as the pilot is a rogue agent.

It is the agent’s responsibility to recognize the need for a different system. Circles of decision and outcome without consideration for a separate circle of decisions may be symptoms of the unacknowledged need. An evolving individual will be entrusted with new decisions to make. When the same decision is repeated, the individual may recognize this as stagnation. Solving new problems is the way of the accepted self. Mastery of decision-making will ensure that the individual has a guiding system.

Forward Momentum

Often, we look to the past to understand a decision. Validation of the past is provided by those who were present, reinforcing the past in the present. However, the past does not occupy the here and now. The present is a continuous opportunity to enforce the accepted self. Rumination only does good in deconstruction. To move forward, one must ideate on how the accepted self will behave and evolve. Constructing the self is an endless endeavor. Control of the present through expectation of routine will usually end in uncomfortable reconciliation between comfort and evolution. Repetition is stagnation. Evolution does not mean drastic measures. It took six million years for humans to evolve from apes, and from that evolution to now, 200,000 years have passed.

Building momentum towards the accepted self consists of developing an intrinsic values system. Separate from how the inner guidance system will crystallize experience, a values system provides the perceiving self with direction. Learning to make decisions that align with the individual’s values will inevitably lead the individual down a path truer to themselves. When working with forward momentum, there will be reflections of the past that arise to demonstrate opportunity for growth. Previous circumstances will provoke the individual to choose differently. Or, to reinforce their decisions that align with their values.

Life does not come linearly. It bends and folds in response to our responses. What appears before us is some mixture of one part of our creation and one part of the creation of randomness. Each time a new challenge arises, the individual will be faced with the choice to evolve or repeat. What’s most important for the individual to store away is that the evolution of the self will almost always be met with resistance. Opposition from the life led before the decision to act will show the individual what’s important to keep from each version of themselves as they move forward. The passage of time is perpetually inescapable; how pleasant the time is that passes is determined by the individual’s desire to make it so. Life bends for everyone; one should respond in a way that creates a life they enjoy.